The Nexus Point
by Aerith Queen of Cetra
Summary: .:SanzoxGoku:. They were destined to meet again, it was a written fact. But it doesn't say anywhere that it had to be a happy reunion...


_Title:_ The Nexus Point

_Author:_ Aerith Queen of Cetra

_Chapters_: 1/1

_Summary_: They were destined to meet again, it was a written fact. But it doesn't say anywhere that it had to be a happy reunion...

_Genre:_ Romance / Angst

_Beta'd:_ Nu-uh!

_Warnings_: Shonen ai, spoilers for 'Even a Worm' arc in Saiyuki Reload, violence, blood, mentions of death, swearing.

**Disclaimer:** Don't own Saiyuki, never owned Saiyuki. I'm off to the pub boys! XD

**Author's Comments:** (comes back from the pub) Better get this done first, uh... haven't read Reload 9 yet... cos it hasn't been translated yet so... this is what I want to happen in the next volume. Angsty reunions AHOY!!

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**The Nexus Point  
**

* * *

_When something does not insist on being noticed, when we aren't grabbed by the collar or struck on the skull by a presence or an event, we take for granted the very things that most deserve our gratitude_

- Cynthia Ozick -

* * *

It had been so long since they had last been acquainted. So very, very long.

And somewhere deep in his mind, whether he wanted to admit it or not, he missed them.

But as the constant wave of demons before him suddenly blew apart by the combined force of a scythe on a chain, a mighty blaze of energy and an extended staff, Genjyo Sanzo considered that perhaps he could have waited a _little_ while longer before their inevitable reunion took place.

There, before his new three man party stood his old allies, all three of whom looked at him with eyes that were furiously stern, so much so that he couldn't believe those gazes were directed towards him.

"What do y'all want?" A confused and disdainful Hazel called out, the only reply being the fighting stances assumed by the newcomers, or at least by two of them.

These were the only words spoken as Sanzo and Goku watched the four men charge at one another, the move seeming as if the four were tearing apart the Red Sea so now the would-be god and the guardian of the Maten Sutra remained in the long, clear path.

As Hakkai and Gojyo fended off the attacks of the mighty Gat and the surprisingly agile Hazel, Sanzo and Goku met in a staring contest, eternally frozen violet eyes meeting the round gold of the brunets eyes.

Sanzo was immobile. Completely and utterly. Perhaps it was in overconfidence, overconfidence that Son Goku, his ward and eternal companion up until recently, would not, in his right, limiter-covered, mind, attack him.

But Goku wasn't thinking the same thing about Sanzo, ready for the harisen, the gun, the sutra to come flying out at him at any moment. He just waited for the right time to make his move, and in the meantime...

"You abandoned us."

The tiny crack of lips around the cigarette was Sanzo's only reaction before a wry, almost angry, grin cracked his face. "Do you really believe that?"

"The evidence is stacked against you, _Sanzo_."

The great disdain in Goku's voice surprised him, it was close to what Sanzo imagined the Seiten Taisei's voice to be if the divine beast dared to speak coherently.

The blond raised his hand and pulled the cigarette from his mouth, throwing it to the ground and crunching the flame into non-existence. _That_ was a bad move.

In the vulnerable moment, a red and gold staff flew towards him and he just managed to roll to the right as the ground where he once stood cracked apart like fragile glass.

In the midst of the crunching sound of rock breaking and dust scattering, Sanzo stared with wide eyes as Goku rose from the fractured spot, head low and fists tight and turned his head, and his furious eyes, towards his once saviour. He raised his Nyoi-bo in an offensive stance.

Sanzo was shocked beyond belief at the sight before him, that Goku had tried to attack him and, although he was sure the younger male had held back, he still couldn't shake himself back into the thoughts that he was still safe from this demonic man whom he had once trusted and cared for more than anyone.

His hand automatically reached for his trusty gun, but his fingers refused to tighten over the hilt as he looked at his charge. The banishing gun would be too much at this point, he didn't even dare to use it against Goku's _true_ form let alone his lovable little monkey who was a _little_ more than irritated at him.

But as Goku took another suspiciously slow lunge at him, Sanzo moved his hand a little away and grasped the paper fan there in a possibly regrettable move and he held it flat and strong, not as strong as the Nyoi-bo under the golden one's grasp but he made a bet on the thought that Goku would still be holding back due to sentimental beliefs.

He bet right.

The Nyoi-bo refused to move past the pathetic defence and Sanzo used this faltering moment to push the boy back far enough so he could discard his fan and make a move to grab the staff instead, forming a more amiable defence.

From opposite him, Goku's eyes burned a molten gold, ready to sear through the monk's skull and, as much as that look pained him, Sanzo willed himself past his _own_ faltering moment as he fought against the horrifically powerful force of the would-be god.

Through strained, gritted teeth, Sanzo tried to reason with the angry force of the demon. "I know... the one who... attacked you. I left... to..."

"To what? To get revenge?" The angry voice screamed out, the wincing grunt from Sanzo acting as a response. "Tell me who you wanted revenge for? For who, Sanzo?"

Goku had overpowered Sanzo by this point and thrown him back onto the ground, straddling the monk's waist and morphing his Nyoi-Bo into its three tiered form so that he could easily pull those harsh hands away and pin them beside his head, with the middle part hovering dangerously over his throat.

"Who did you want revenge for? Me? Or you?"

"You of course, you idiot!" He seethed back with acidic obviousness.

Goku's hands shook around the weapon. "What's the point of getting revenge for someone, if you lose them along the way?"

Sanzo was gob-smacked, the noises of fighting from behind them were suddenly drowned out by Goku's statement, for those were the words that dared to float through his mind but never dared to break to the surface of awareness.

The fists that tightened around the weapon clenched so greatly that they actually weakened as Goku leaned his head in closer to Sanzo's, as if to emphasise his point.

"Sanzo, what did you think would happen when I found out you were gone? Did you think I would be _happy_ that you'd _disappeared_ to get revenge for me?" Goku's head lowered and eyes closed over in pain.

"I had to hear it from Hakkai and Gojyo that you were gone! I had to hear that, as I lay there practically dead, you just ran off! With _Hazel_ of all people! If you really wanted to help me..." It was only now that Goku opened his eyes and tears seeped out of the edges of them, frustrated, angry tears which had built up from weeks apart from Sanzo. "... you would've stayed with me, when I needed you the most!"

Sanzo was silent during this speech, completely torn by what he heard. The things that he tried to deny were being brought to the surface and he hated himself so much for what he had done.

_I thought I heard the sound of something breaking..._

Sanzo had heard something break. He had heard it. But he had brushed it off. It was the sound of his own morality breaking, his own selfish definition of justice overwhelming what was _truly_ right.

"Goku-"

"No!" The middle segment of the weapon pulled down against his throat, not enough to choke him but enough to prove an almost painful point. "I've heard you talk, make your little speeches and recite your stupid Buddhist sayings and now it's my turn."

"Sanzo, we're a team. I know we've never really said it properly but we are and it's time you realised that. We can't be the 'Sanzo party' if '_Sanzo'_ doesn't trust '_the party'_."

"How can I trust someone who's got a weapon wrapped around my throat?"

"You don't have the right to ask that." Goku refused to flinch at the comment, his eyes narrowing only a tiny fraction. "I'm the one who's supposed to ask how can I trust someone who abandons me in my worst possible moment?"

In a matter of seconds, Goku had quickly moved one hand inside Sanzo's robes and felt the unfamiliar steel of the Smith and Wesson underneath his fingertips as he pulled the gun out and banished the Nyoi-bo into nothingness.

Sanzo had no time to even grunt out a reaction as Goku's now free hand grasped the front of his robes and pulled him forward, the other, gun wielding hand moving to place the weapon into one of Sanzo's hands before pulling it forward too so that they were in a _very_ advantageous position for the priest.

Sanzo now sat up straight with the barrel of his gun placed exactly where the now weaponless Goku wanted it to be, right underneath where his limiter was, a clean and easy shot for Sanzo if he wanted to pull the trigger.

They stayed there for several moments, Sanzo's irritation rising as he stared into the face before him, the face which reflected nothing but placidness despite his vulnerable position.

Sanzo's hand tightened around both the gun and the foreign fingers that were still wrapped securely around it. "You're right, you shouldn't trust me. You're a demon."

A faint rattle of metal emphasised his seriousness. "And_ this_ is a banishing gun."

No response from the boy. Sanzo was getting even more irritated. Very, _very_ irritated and his finger finally made a move to curl through the loop that contained the trigger.

"Then do it."

And all of Sanzo's threats fell through. In a matter of seconds, which dared to push towards a full minute, his steely glare was reduced to a disappointed face fall and the gun, and the warm, conjoined hands of the two males, were pulled down to lay uselessly in his lap.

His mind continued to scream the thing that he so desperately wanted to say, but instead his mouth let out the two most predictable words in the universe.

"Stupid monkey."

Goku suddenly broke out into a wide grin, his hand shaking as it dared to tighten around the monk's pale one, and Sanzo's innards let out relieved breaths at the return to normality despite the fact that Goku still sat in the blonde's lap and showed no signs of wanting to move.

"I'll always trust you, Sanzo. I've always stuck with you, through thick and thin." His grin soon fell into a sad smile. "But... I can't keep this up if you don't trust – _us_."

They both turned to the forgotten remnants of their groups, Hakkai flinging increasingly weakening chi blasts at the now exhausted Hazel and Gojyo standing behind him with his feet buried into the ground trying to restrain Gat with the chain of his weapon.

Hakkai seemed to notice this look by Goku as he leapt backwards and mumbled something to Gojyo, something that made him loosen his grip enough for the two of them to summon Hakuryuu from his hiding place, jump into the empty seats of the jeep and speed towards Goku.

"... now you know. We'll be gone after tonight. You know where we are... So... You'll have to decide before then." He finished up his speech before abandoning his comfortable position on Sanzo's lap to place himself beside Gojyo in the backseat as the loud machine sped into the distance.

And as Hazel and Gat made their way to Sanzo's side, the monk refused to acknowledge them, instead focusing on the disappearing glint of gold that refused to leave his mind's eye.

* * *

"He's not going to come."

"Now now, Gojyo, we don't know that for certain. For all we know, Sanzo misses us too."

Hakkai noted Gojyo's scoff with a wry smile as he watched the man who sat by the tiny table dispose of his cigarette.

"I don't miss that stuck up prick, Hakkai, but the monkey is another story..."

Goku sat on the only bed in the room, in the cheapest room in the hotel, and stared worryingly through the window at the blank night.

Hakkai narrowed his eyes and grabbed Gojyo's arm, pulling him out the door. "We're going to take some time out to enjoy the night-life. We'll be back later."

"And get to bed, kid! We don't need your cranky ass spoiling your diapers tomorrow, we have a long journey ahead."

Hakkai forcefully shoved his elbow in Gojyo's side as he pleaded for Goku to ignore that comment but he needn't have bothered, Goku barely regarded their departure with a flicker of irises let alone have need to be begged for ignorance.

He sat there for well over thirty minutes after _their_ departure, his thoughts of the earlier battle having flown through his mind too... persistently.

Goku closed his eyes as he swung his legs over the edge of the bed and sat with his head in his hands, willing time to pass more quickly so that he could be relieved of the constant nagging voice, which sounded suspiciously like Gojyo's, that Sanzo wasn't going to come.

Just as his straggled mind was ready to succumb to sleep, a strange noise echoed from the doorway but his heavy eyes were unable to open and see what it was and as it completely ceased, Goku passed it off as his own imagination.

But as the noises restarted and a gentle pressure fell across his head, Goku couldn't pass it off as another strange notion of the mind, and his insides sighed blissfully as he realised who owned those familiar fingers that danced through his hair and tickled carefully along the lines of his limiter.

His eyes found their way open as he smiled up at the soft look on Sanzo's face, at the thin, almost unnoticeable, curve of his mouth which told him he was here to stay.

"I thought you weren't going to show up..."

The monk scoffed satirically as he removed his hand from the person he thought he would never see again. "You should've trusted me."

Goku chuckled, feeling as if he deserved that but he could do no more, the tiredness of the day was unwilling to relent in its grip around him.

Sanzo noticed this and moved carefully to push Goku back in the bed into a lying position. "You'd better sleep you dumb monkey, we're heading out first thing tomorrow."

To remind himself that this was still Sanzo and not a dream or at least a trick from Gojyo, Goku asked. "To the West?"

"Of course '_to the West_', where else do you think we've been going all this time?"

He chuckled and shook his head, eyes already tightly wired shut. "As long as you're... here in the morning..."

As Goku began drifting away from him, Sanzo stared around at the shabby single room and scoffed. "You three really are hopeless without me."

Recalling his brief encounter with the two other members of 'the party' earlier and the fact that he had given away his room in order to have a few reconciling moments with his charge, he shook his head. "But... I can't say much, I'm pretty hopeless myself."

He sat upon the bed with firm resolve that the floor wouldn't be comfortable enough for a man as important as he and he resumed his petting motion through Goku's hair.

Although this would turn out to be a bad idea, or a good one depending on who was looking at it, as Goku rolled around and placed his head gently in Sanzo's lap, curling his hands around the lithe waist like a great big teddy bear. Sanzo considered that it couldn't get any worse, but as Goku slithered higher and higher up the body to rest against his well-built chest, Sanzo just decided to shut his trap.

Groaning, he leaned down and kissed Goku's forehead gently, his lips curling around the cold limiter before Sanzo let his head fall back against the headboard, sleep daring to cross his own violet eyes and as they closed over. The last sight they beheld was the reflection of a gold band in the windowsill which bore the lamentable night and Sanzo mumbled something about a 'stupid idiot' before he let his head fall down against Goku's and his arms curl protectively around the gentle demonic force.

--

"_Oh my... it seems like they've fallen asleep."_

"_Not only that but on top of each other, you don't think that they...?"_

"_Don't be silly! ... but it does look like - never mind. We should probably check out our room."_

"_Knowing him it'll be a fancy shmancy suite, with a very comfy bed!"_

"_Yes _'a'_ comfortable bed. I'd hardly think he got a room with two beds."_

"_Oh yeah... So... you want us to... do what they're doing?"_

"_Well... we could always play cards for it?"_

Gojyo groaned at Hakkai's soft laughter as he closed the door to the two sleeping men.

* * *

XDD Riight... I couldn't help but sneak a little bit of GojyoxHakkai at the end hee hee... Now, here's a question I would love to get answered. Why is GojyoxHakkai called 58 and GokuxSanzo called 39? Who came up with these numbers? XDD

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the fic and I also hope that I portrayed these guys as accurately as possible without Minekura-sensei having to get involved and uh... please review guys! XD


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